The strength of the others

Most of you (or maybe all of you) would probably agree with me, if I said that all people have their strengths and weaknesses. All respective characteristics are distinct and create the whole picture comprised of personality, capability and capacity.

Why is it then that in dancing it’s particularly difficult to notice and recognize the strengths of the others? Does it lie in the fact that our own weakness is mirrored in the other’s strength? Or is it the mere fact that many people think that they can see their own strength in the other’s weakness?

Since this year it has been 15 years that I’ve been teaching couple dance. When I think of this number, I can’t imagine that it has been that long since I stood in my first class. It seems as if it was yesterday. But during this time I’ve had a great opportunity to observe myself, my dance partners and many dance couples that I’ve met. What struck me the most in these experiences is the people’s lack of ability to analyze situations and their own weaknesses and strengths. Misguided or maybe simply not experienced enough, one always goes back to the question “Whose fault is it?” which pops out almost always when a dance move doesn’t work out the way it should. 

However, instead of analyzing and finding the solution to the problem, we often spend too much time on trying to discover whose fault was it. Emotions run high and add up to blocking the way towards a peaceful way out. Instead of using the opportunity to learn and get new insights from someone, we’re often more concentrated on analyzing this other person, more than analyzing ourselves.

During my business studies I had the opportunity to learn a lot of things which I find useful both in dance and in life, primarily from an 80-year-old teacher who mesmerized me every single second of the two-day-seminar I participated in. Respect and acknowledgment towards the people around you as well as the awareness of your own strengths and weaknesses are the most important factors on the way towards satisfaction and success.

Only when I respect the other’s abilities to the fullest am I able to appreciate and take notice of their strengths. I could do that much better though, if I would turn to myself for starters and analyze my own strengths and weaknesses. Knowing and accepting your own strengths and weaknesses is therefore inevitably the starting point of any kind of learning, success, serenity,…

I believe thus that it is a great virtue, both in life and in dance, to learn from the others’ strength. 

(Translated by Martina Pranjić - Thank you)